{ No We, Just Me }
Ok this is random.. 8:11 PM • Thursday, May 06, 2010
I was talking to a friend yesterday and it reminded me of a conversation between Miss V and Adrian (friend of ours)
Ok so we were talking about the difference in terms of culture for ppl in Asia and here in the Western part of the world.
We realise like we Asians, emphasise alot on WE, US, Together, kind of thing, and we often, selflessly put ourselves, Me and I at the back of our head..
Very often we are in situations that involves not just me, but us, and very often we see ourselves put this us ahead of me..
We also felt that Asians are often very dependent on their partners, be it husband or boyfriend or girlfriend, and alot of times, opportunities are missed because we never put ourselves ahead of others..
See this friend of mine was given an opportunity to study overseas, she gave up because she was going to get "married". If it were to happen to people here in the Western world, they will probably be : yeah we will still get married BUT I will go ahead with my studies too.
So Miss V commented that I am really independent, and then I went back and think, yeah I always put myself ahead of others, not bcos I am selfish but bcos its better to first help yourself then helping others. For most of my life, I had to make decisions for myself, mainly bcos my parents are not well educated and they probably cant believe until today that their daughters could get a decent degree. When it comes to studying, what course to study, what school to go to, it was basically decisions made by me and my sister.. We grew up in such a way and environment that we are living in the world with I and not We. I mean we still family la, but we always put I, Me before anything else...
Then another incident.
See I have a couple of really close friends getting married this year and sadly, I cant attend bcos I wanted to fulfill and make good use of my remaining time here. Although these people are really good friends of mine, but I cant really see myself going to their wedding and miss this heavenly opportunity to explore Europe that I probably wont have any chance to anymore. Sounds wrong but to me, its more important to fulfill what I wish for than what others wish from me. Bcos by the end of the day, its their wedding and not mine, and ultimately they are going to forget the fact that I travelled all the way back to attend to their wedding. And me, probably be sulking over it (which I dun want to happen esp in a wedding)..
So most Asians, will probably go to the wedding and sulk for the rest of their lives.. See Madlynn, Miss V bestie, she is poor, like fucking fucking poor, and yet she would spend money on air tix to a friend's wedding whom she is not even that close to, because simply that person told her, I want YOU to be there.. This person wouldnt know how poor she is and probably would forget the fact that she had to buy a fucking expensive air tix to travel back to attend the wedding.. See this is what I meant as WE over ME. Cos to her, the value friendship comes with sacrifice.. BUT in this case, if you dn have money just dun go la! Haiyo..
If friendship is really calculated by this mere means of sacrification, then sad to say your friend doesnt know what is friendship then. A true friend will always understand the situation before they start pointing fingers, like why you never come to my wedding cos I am not valuable to you right, shit like happens to friends who doesnt know what is the true value of friendship..
As a friend, you dun need to be physically there to have you presence stated.
Here I have my rant, and sorry I cant be there for the grand day. Cos I REALLY WANT TO TOUR EUROPE LA!!!! haha
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